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www.kevacho.com
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Kevin Michael Vance
Writer - Portland, Oregon
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August 08, 2015
Oh... Portland.
I was driving home from the gym today and saw what, for me, sums up everything wrong with the city I no longer recognize, or honestly, want to be a part of. In front of me (after he had blatantly ran a red light) drove some bearded twenty to thirty-something driving a huge, painfully expensive SUV with a "Keep Portland Weird" bumper sticker, and yes... California plates. And I thought... well, first I thought, "fuck you! You fucking hipster degenerate! You're part of the problem, not the solution!" Then I thought, "what does that mean to him?" "Keep Portland Weird". He doesn't even know what weird means. And by the single fact of his license plates, he has no clue as to what Portland is, and most undoubtedly blissfully ignorant of what it once was. He is what is wrong with the Californians moving to Portland. They do not move to a place and acclimate. No. That is both beyond their capacity for cognizant thought, and below their over-inflated egos and self-inflated pride. They move to a place and change it. Change it with their money and influence. Change the decor and the surroundings and the rent prices so that it better resembles the gentrified cities and suburbs of the state they are actively fleeing.
I have been here for twenty years. In that time I have seen Portland go from a livable city that had real character and real diversity, to a white-washed facsimile of San Diego where white people parade their first-world problems like medals of honor and change 39th street to Cesar Chavez Boulevard to atone for some misplaced, misappropriated sense of white-guilt. Go home Californian's. You ruined your state and your cities. And now you're intentionally trying to ruin Portland.
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