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Kevin Michael Vance
Writer - Portland, Oregon
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Title: SINISTER
Director: Scott Derrickson
Year: 2012
Reviewed: March 11, 2013
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Rice Cake-Lowest Rating |
[Rating Definitions]
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Sinister, the movie, sucks. And it sucks real bad.
So there's an evil, and ancient pagan god, who loves to kill families every once and a while. Oh! And he looks suspiciously like the drummer from Slip Knot, or some American black metal fan. Oh! And he likes to film the murder of these families on 8mm film. We don't know why he does it, he just does. And he gives these films to Ethan Hawke, who happens to be a true crime author. We don't know why he gives him these films. He just does. These films are like grainy snuff films, and the only truly disturbing thing in Sinister (except of course when the image of the god shows up in these films). Even Ethan Hawke's character asks in Act 1, why someone, or something... duh, duh... duh, gave him the grisly films. But that question is never answered; which is the fundamental flaw with the whole film. It is basically just a slew of set ups with zero pay off. For instance, and here's a spoiler, the killers of each family happen to be children. And the families are killed in very staged manners. In one case, a family of five is hanged by a tree branch until dead, and the person responsible is supposedly this five to seven year old girl. I would like to know how this girl was able to drag her entire family to a tree, and successfully hang the lot of them? Was she imbued with the strength of this pagan god? Did the god intervene and help her? For surely, I am not to believe that this little girl had the strength to hang not just her siblings but her mother and father. Ethan Hawke is good, but the movie is so bad and so disjointed and so illogical and so ridiculous that he can't make it any better; no matter how hard he may try.
Sinister, is horrible. That's why I give it my dreaded RICE CAKE review.
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