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©2002-2024
Kevin Michael Vance
Writer - Portland, Oregon
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Title: PAPARAZZI
Director: Paul Abascal
Year: 2004
Reviewed: September 18, 2005
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Rice Cake-Lowest Rating |
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I used to like Mel a lot. Braveheart is one of my all time favorite movies. The first Lethal Weapon is fantastic, and his performance (and bitchin' mullet) is mesmerizing. I also think he did more than a wonderful job in the movie version of Hamlet. But Paparazzi, the movie he produced a year ago, ain't like any o' those others.
"Paparazzi" gets the dreaded RICE CAKE review.
What can I say really? This movie is all sorts of awful, covered by a big, fat covering of stupid and wrapped up in a glittering wrapper of twisted morality. Mel doesn't even direct, he simply produces, but I mention him because it's painfully obvious he had a large hand in the making of this film. And he wants everybody to know it, too. So much so, that he is physically on celluloid, a bit part where he's sitting in a psychiatrist's office waiting to go to Anger Management therapy. Hhmm… what does that mean? Could it mean that Mel- Bible Thumper extraordinaire- is sending a message to paparazzi everywhere? I think so. One of my favorite, less-known actors, Cole Hauser, is in this and not even his clean cut, good looks, or gritty, yet subdued, southern drawl can pull this festering piece of celluloid out of the steaming, cess pool.
All right, I will give you the gist of this film in two sentences. One: Actors live perfect lives. And Two: it's okay to kill paparazzi. I swear to you, this is what this movie's about. Cole Hauser's character kills not one, but two paparazzi, and is responsible for the death of a third, and he lives happily ever after at the end. Now it's not that I don't think that paparazzi deserve death. I do. Most of them are parasites- less than corpse-eating maggots. But I wouldn't make a movie about it. Flat, slightly disturbing, and dead- that's what paparazzi is. And to make it even worse Gibson tries to give us some "old-testament" morals and justice and tell us that not only is murder right, but when it's perpetrated by a good looking actor it's just.
Let's see if I can recommend better revenge films. Here, I'll give you a list: The Crow, Payback, First Blood, Desperado… just to name a few.
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