|
www.kevacho.com
©2002-2024
Kevin Michael Vance
Writer - Portland, Oregon
|
|
|
Go Back To Reviews
Title: POLTERGEIST
Director: Gil Kenan
Year: 2015
Reviewed: February 06, 2015
Rating: |
|
| |
| |
| |
| |
Rice Cake-Lowest Rating |
[Rating Definitions]
|
|
|
Oh gods! No! It's not enough that Hollyweird is taking every wonderful, ground-breaking film I grew up with and spitting out colorful, cringe-worthy, copies; but now they're tackling absolute classics like Poltergeist, Terminator, and, the already mentioned and lamented, Ghost Busters and Indiana Jones.
Stop it, Hollywood! Just fucking stop it! Enough is enough! Poltergeist is absolutely brilliant, as are Indiana Jones and Ghost Busters. Directed by Tobe Hooper and written, in part, by Steven-fucking-Spielberg, you simply cannot and will not improve upon this monumental film, and or, films. I know you have screenplays that are worth producing. I know you have original stories that audiences want to see. Grow a pair, slap down some dough, and do something wonderful and new. You know, I grew up in the 1980's, and I'm still flummoxed by how people vilify and pass over such a rich and decadent decade. The movies were fantastic. The books were superlative. The music was transcendent. The fashion was... well, the fashion was repulsive, but it stands to reason with no courage, no drive, no integrity, and no fortitude Hollywood would look back and try to recreate the wonder of those simple years. And again, I say stop it. You will not recapture shit. You, the industry of Hollywood film, are crushing dreams. I weep for the imagination of the "youtube" generation; weened on processed milk and processed food and processed films. No wonder they think bodily injury is art. No wonder they think lighting themselves on fire is worth fifteen minutes of non-existent fame.
Change your ways Hollywood, or fade from memory.
|
|